Falling from grace requires you to have been in a state of grace in the first place. Falling from grace and entering what I wonder. Grace is the quality of refinement. So, if you lose the fineness, the beauty, the excellence ... what have you become?
Something dirty? Something impure? The other one. Always the other one. Not the one who is your friend, your son or daughter, your loved one. The other one. The neighbour perhaps. Why do people like kids? Not everyone finds babies cute, but apparently everyone finds baby animals cute. Why is any life form considered cute when it's young anyway? Because when you're a small shit no one expects anything from you other than to eat, be excited, run around, get dirty and break things. Well, newsflash motherfuckers: I still like to eat, get excited, run around, get dirty and break things. Only now, it is unnatural. It's unnatural because now I'm supposed to only be excited about the things others want, run only after what / whom others think I ought to, not get dirty * cough sexual activities * and not break anything * cough law abiding citizen *. I have respect for other people's well-being and by no means am promoting a kill, maim, rape and pillage the village attitude. I'm not a fan of Chaos. BUT. I'm a fan of my own, private and personal chaos . It's so easy promoting shit like carpe diem -seize the day-, "there's no you can't, only a you don't want to" etc. and whining about "young people not being the way we were back in the good ol 'days". What? WHAT? You don't expect us to seize the day. You expect us to seize your dick and suck it. All this you-can-be-anything-you-want-to is BullShit. Sure, you can be anything you like son, but it's gonna be better if what you like is what I approve of. And actually, if it comes to the point where what you like is not what is generally approved of, that means I have failed as a parent, you have disappointed everyone and you will fail in life. Fallen from grace.
This isn't about parents. Parents aren't supposed to understand; What was right back in their days of glory is probably a bit outdated now anyway. This is about becoming an insecure, fucked up individual or lobotomizing yourself either by giving in or by giving up with the aid of psychotropic substances and forgetting all about what you really pursued. If someone is making you disappointed at yourself, that's "helping" you self-destruct and not motivating you to become better from my perspective. I have known so many people doing drugs or becoming drunk stupid on a regular basis that witnessing such situations seems kinda ludicrous now. Since I am not like mommy Society, I am not disappointed due to their "potential for success being shattered". There's no such thing as potential. The greatest retard can succeed if they pull their shit together and do a few basic things right. What I am disappointed about is that no one seems to realise that destroying your life is not a decision. It's not an action. It is a REaction. People DO kill, maim, rape and pillage. Only it is themselves they are doing it to. If it was an actual choice, I would be a supporter of that lifestyle. Hell, I'd even join all relevant facebook groups there would be for that. All the drug and alkohol appreciation societies. I'd throw a party everytime someone died of an overdose. Destroyed kidneys would be as glorious as battle wounds. Sadly this isn't the case. In a few words, what bothers me is that we are not being fed with the tools to make our dreams come true. We are being force fed with drugs and mind-numbing methods so that we can all fit in ~ The Bigger Plan ~. The ones who press the self-destruction button in a more definite way than the rest of us, do this because of all the seize-the-day hypocrites. This IS a law of the jungle society and YOU ARE KILLING us the moment you start suspecting we don't exactly share the same ideas with you. Drug cartels and dealers are not killers. The ones who make people end up doing drugs are killers. It's not about telling you what you can't do. It's about telling you what you have to want to do.
FUCK THIS. I 've never taken any -ahem- illegal substances and I don't drink pathologically. Actually, I have little patience with those who do. I understand why they are doing it and respect the fact that at the end of the day everyone has the right to live the way they like, but I also have the right to consider them weak and not want weak people near me. When it comes to being bullied by *external factors, I choose not to give in. I choose to throw shit back where it came from and not at myself . I'm not going to make myself a vessel for what is appropriate OR inappropriate according to the regular standards. I am going to make myself the PART of society that backfired and either changed or destroyed something and created something else. That's what's hardcore. Not drinking till you throw up cause Life dumped you. If life is a whore, I'll pay her to amuse ME. And any fucker who tells me what I should be has it coming. I am only seizing the day after all ...
* Emphasis put on "external" -anyone who has read previous posts knows I AM in fact self-destructive when it comes to inner mumbo jumbo emotional knots.
A reader's feedback on this post included the following question: "Who's more retarded -a kid with down syndrome or the person judging them?" My answer is: both are; I represent the third party in this situation-> The kid's retarded, it's not his / her fault, but I don't want retarded friends cause cruel as it is, such dynamics just CAN'T work for neither one of us. Person judging is retarded, but this is different cause they are being retarded by choice and based on the belief that they are soo much better . That's the kind of person that deserves getting fucked up cause they have it coming. That's the hypocrites who run this world. That's what bullying is. Judging drug addicts not because you understand what they have gone through, but because you will sleep better at night knowing that you are above those "society's parasites". I have empathy towards those "parasites" and that's why I don't have any sympathy towards the ones who judge the "retarded kid". And yes, maybe those with self-inflicted troubles -and all of society's les miserables generally speaking- shouldn't have let themselves be influenced in the first place. But then again, some others shouldn't have been pricks to them.
Demon Inside Crying by The Schismarch is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 Greece License.